It's all relative.

Note: The following post was written July 8, 2014

I remember one day when I was in 3rd grade. It was grandparents day and my mom, Grandma Bebe, and I were in class. They were invited to our class for the day. After the festivities were over, I realized I had forgotten to do my homework. I repeat...I had forgotten to do my homework. If you know me at all, you know that is not me at all. I was basically in tears because I forgot to do one measly 3rd grade assignment. How little and inconsequential that one assignment was in the grand scheme of life.

In 7th grade, I made one B. One B the whole year. Do I even need to tell you how sad I was?

Flash forward to my senior year in college - it was finals in the fall semester. I had 4 finals that required a lot of work- I was still finishing my reading for Shakespeare the night before the final. Don't even get me started on Non-Euclidean Geometry.... .I felt like I'd never make it to Christmas break. There were some long nights at the library. Christmas break seemed so far and somehow it came. And I passed and everything worked out.

I am the type of student (and teacher) that always gets anxious before the first day of school. I am the type of student that still has school-gone-bad dreams. I have (I repeat: currently have) a reoccurring dream that I am in college and forget to attend math class all semester. And it's the end of the semester and I'm failing...

So here I am 3 days before my dissertation is "due" for committee distribution and I feel yet again that I will never make it to the other side of  this wall....that these 3 days will never end. That I'll never graduate. And yet all that stands between me and the end are a few days...albeit long days, but a few days just the same.

So it's all relative, right? What I thought was the end of the world in 4th grade sure did feel like it to me. And it wasn't. What I thought was the end of the world in fall 05, sure felt like it to me.  But it wasn't. I finished. I passed. And right now, in this place, my head knows that this too shall pass... and like most things in life...it will all be ok.

And once it's over...you'll all have to call me Dr.

Thanks and gigem.

My life lesson from Van Gogh

One of my favorite art moments was when Van Gogh's Starry Night came to Houston. A friend and I drove from College Station to see it. Why, you ask?  Because it is the Starry Night. Everybody knows this painting. Everyone can pick it out. It's practically Van Gogh's claim to fame. We all talk how great the painting is, how beautiful it is, and how talented Van Gogh was.

Last week I was in France and Van Gogh is everywhere in France.  I especially enjoyed following his footsteps in Arles and St. Remy. In these two small towns in Provence, France, I was able to walk where he walked, see what he saw. I also learned more about his life than I had before and what struck me most, was how alone he was. Now sure he's one of the most well-known artists of all time. When you think of artists, he'd be in your top 5, for sure. But at the time that he lived, people thought he was weird and strange. The people of Arles signed a petition requesting him to leave the city. Now, yes, he did some strange things and clearly posed some aggressive behavior and he did cut off his ear and hand it to a bartender. Yes, those are all strange, but after it's all said and done, he was ridiculously talented, but still so shunned. And so alone. I felt so sorry for him. He had so much to give, but it didn't matter. People didn't care. They wanted him gone.

Now, truth be told. I don't know the whole story and you may know more about VanGoh than I do and I would love to keep learning. So let's meet for a drink and share Van Goh stories. But my take-away from this part of the trip was that he was alone and people shunned him. And really, regardless of what anyone does or says, I still hate to think that they have no one and that they will still be alone.

I hope that I can see past people's perceived weirdness. I hope that I can see past poor choices and mistakes. I hope that no matter what, I still choose to love people - all kinds of people. And I know it's not easy and I am not blameless when it comes to unconditional love. But sometimes people just need community - other people to show them that they have value and that they are loved. We all just need people to go through this journey with.

Van Gogh made ordinary things beautiful. Ordinary buildings became extraordinary buildings. Normal colors became vivid blues and yellows. A typical night became one of the most famous paintings of all time. But what's difficult to understand is that a man who saw beauty in so many things, could not see the beauty in himself.

It makes me sad, but also serves as a reminder that there are people out there that need to be reminded that they are beautiful. They need my love and I hope I don't keep it from them - for any reason at all.

A replica of Cafe at Night 

in front of the original cafe painted by Van Gogh

My favorite coffee shops in Houston

I am no food critique nor a coffee expert. But I live near some really great coffee shops and I like good coffee. Isn't that enough to have an opinion? And also, people ask me what my favorite places are, so here they are. If you don't agree, that's ok. But these are mine.

1. Blacksmith - Blacksmith is run by the same people as Anvil. If you've been to Anvil, read no further. That is all you need to know. Just like Anvil, they do everything well. I expected nothing less from the Anvil people. (Which is how I feel about Pastry war, too, so my next blog might be on my favorite margaritas). Back to Blacksmith - Possibly the best coffee in the city, in my opinion. It's adorable inside, good coffee, wi-fi, and amazing biscuits. What more do you want? The drawbacks are they keep the temperature cold  and there are no couches. This works for me, because I usually need to work, but if I want to read a book and relax, I usually don't go here. And one of the biggest perks - they make their own almond milk and it's amazing. Try the flat white. Add vanilla. You will not go wrong.

2. Southside Espresso - This is my newest fave. It's everything you think a hipster coffee shop should look like. They have wi-fi, good coffee, beer, wine, and all the milk substitutes. Oh and they have Topo Chico. Did I mention it's hipster? A lady walked in last week and ordered "A coconut milk latte and a vegan muffin." I love Houston. If you're not vegan, don't worry they have all the other pastries, too. Although, I haven't actually tried the pastries, so I can't speak from experience, but I'm sure they're good. Oh and there is always room to sit, which is a huge plus. It's a little hidden gem behind Uchi on Westheimer and it's good.

3. Catalina's coffee - Before I discovered #1 and #2, this was my Houston fave. And it's still darn good coffee. This is where I go to read. They don't have wi-fi, so I usually can't work here. But they have a great couch where I make myself comfortable and read.  Also, they don't have almond milk. I try to not drink real milk, so this is a draw back for me. They have soy milk, though. But if you want to splurge on the real deal, it's good. I promise.

4. Revival Market - This is a neighborhood favorite. On so many levels. They have good coffee and also a good latte. They have almond and soy milk. They are a meat-centric market, so apparently they do meat well. I don't actually know from experience, but I don't doubt it's good. After you get your coffee, shop for local produce. We once got breakfast in exchange for blood oranges from our tree. They are not kidding about being local. Love this place. It's a great little place and is so much more than a coffee shop. If you've never been, you must stop by and check it out. This is the heights. And I love it.

You only get 4, because for me, there is a drop off from these four to all the other coffee shops. That's just how much I like them. If you like good coffee, you'll like them, too. You will.

I have been to pretty much most coffee places in the heights/montrose area. If I didn't mention it, it's probably because I don't consider it to be on the same level as these. But let me know what your fave is and if I haven't been there, I will be sure to try it out.

My 30th Birthday

I set out to write an amazing, heartfelt, post of all the wise things I learned in my 20's. It was going to be witty and wise, and have a catchy theme, like "30 things I learned before 30." And it never came. And I thought and I thought and it still never came. And yesterday, while in the shower - which mind you is where all my great thoughts develop - I realized that I couldn't write it became I was thinking about it all wrong. I realized that my 30th Birthday doesn't mark the end of anything. I can't spend all week grieving my lost 20's or thinking of all the things I haven't done by now. That is silly. Hitting 30 is just another day. And besides, I have a good life and so many things to be proud of and grateful for. So, today on my 30th, I'm not going to look at it is at the end of something, but rather look at it as just another day for me to be the very best Lauren that I can.  

Bringing back the Holiday Spirit with a Bag of Ice.

Christmas is stressful. It's become about expensive gifts and bigger and better Christmas lights. I'm not big on Christmas decorations. I don't put up a tree, I put up minimal decorations, and Brad and I don't give each other gifts. This is my way of avoiding Christmas stress. This is my way of trying to preserve the Holiday spirit. What good is a bunch of decorations if it causes stress? What good is shopping for the perfect gift, if the gift isn't even appreciated? Where has the Holiday spirit gone?

I try not to push my minimalist Holiday view on others, but inevitably I'm reminded every year that the holiday season has become less about loving people, family time, and baby Jesus, and more about gifts, decorations and elves on the shelves.

But this year I saw a glimpse of the Holiday Spirit and it made my heart smile. We threw our annual Lights in the Heights party. This is the reason I put up any decorations at all. And every year the corner store runs out of ice really early in the day. What can you expect when 40,000 Houstonians are visiting the Heights? Brad walked to the corner store, just after a guy had bought the rest of the ice. So Brad walked back to house without ice. These things happen, right? As Brad was walking back to the house, the guy that bought all of the ice drove by and gave Brad some ice. Small, insignificant, gesture? Possibly. But on the biggest Heights event night of the year, it meant something. In the midst of hosting and party planning, this guy remembered to spread the holiday spirit. He remembered Christmastime is about giving. So here's to you, random Heights guy - Thank you for spreading Holiday cheer and reminding me that the Holiday spirit is still alive and well. You just have to be open to it.

One second can change everything.

Yes, this is a blog post about the Auburn/Alabama. Yes, it might seem ridiculous to you, especially if you don't like college football. But I've been thinking about this game all weekend. Did you see it? Did you see what happened in the last second?

All I keep thinking about is that one second can change everything. Alabama fought to regain that last second. A little bitty measly second that in the grand scheme of the game, didn't really mean much. But in that second, everything changed. Going into that last second, I (and probably everyone else) was thinking - "Of course he won't make it, but what do they have to loose?" Apparently, they had everything to loose. The game, the SEC championship game, and the national title game. All of that (possibly) gone, because of one second.

All football aside, it's amazing how such small inconsequential events in our lives can change everything. Life is so unpredictable and you never know what is going to happen. It is so important to make every second count because you never know what will come from it.

Goodbye to Row 18

Last Saturday felt like the end of an era. It was (most likely) Johnny's last game. And it was the end of Kyle Field as we know it. Texas A&M will begin a multi stage reconstruction of Kyle Field and they have started with our side of Kyle Field. I know it's just a football stadium and I know that many people do not understand the love of college football. But for me, Kyle Field is special. Texas A&M is special. And although this is the beginning of something exciting, it's also the end of an era.

For two seasons we lucked into amazing seats. 35 yard line, Row 18 Seats 17 and 18. We sat with the same people for two seasons and it was two very exciting seasons at that. I sure will miss those seats, but with change, come memories of good times. I have so many memories at Kyle Field.

I remember attending my first Aggie Football game with Amanda and Jaclyn. I have no idea who we played, but for the first time, I understood firsthand what Aggie Football was all about. And I was never the same.

I remember the game we beat Oklahoma in 2002. They were ranked #1 and we beat them. It still ranks as one of my top games I've ever attended.

I remember watching my dance friend, Cheri perform on a platform on Kyle Field at Midnight Maddness. A platform because at that time, A&M wasn't ready for dancers to touch the field. My, we sure have changed.

I remember attending Revellie's funeral with my friend Evan at Kyle Field. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, but I do know that we were good Ags for attending.

I remember the empty stadium at the September 22, 2005 game vs. Texas State. It was my ring day and just that morning I had cried because my parents (and my friends' parents) couldn't get to College Station because of the massive traffic jam Hurricane Rita had created. But the upside was that school was canceled the next day. No one came in town for the game and as students we had the stadium to ourselves. We sat where we wanted, celebrated our new rings, and then walked to Northgate. What else were we going to do on this surprise school Holiday?

I remember the game against Nebraska a few years ago. That was a loud game! and exciting! and crazy good. A game won completely by field goals.

And I will always remember the last game before the construction. A simple game against Mississippi State turned into a memorable event. I'll always remember Johnny Football jumping into the stands to Saw Varisty's horns off just a few rows in front of us. And there were fireworks to complete the night.

For me, Texas A&M is a safe place of happy memories. It's where we are part of something greater than ourselves. It's where we belong.

So goodbye to row 18. Goodbye to the old Kyle Field. I will always reminisce on my Aggie memories, but also look forward to all the new memories that the new Kyle Field will bring.

Thanks and Gig 'em. 

Our farewell picture to Row 18.
And it's not my best look, don't judge. I had just gotten out of a 2-day doctoral test. 

Half-time vs. Mississippi State